Wednesday, August 28, 2013

Kindergarten

I just dropped Kylie off for her first day of Kindergarten. She did wonderful! She stood in line so nice. I thought I was going to cry but held back until I got back in the car. She's so grown up!

Monday, August 19, 2013

Dentist

This past weekend Chloe would say "my teeth hurt." And then point to the top front teeth. I would look and not see anything, but better be safe than sorry so I made a dentist appointment. I made one for Kylie as well. They had an opening this afternoon so I took the girls.  Kylie was nervous but wanted to go first and did a great job. She has good teeth so far. Then while we waited for the dentist, Chloe would say "my turn, my turn." She was eager to have them look in her mouth. I will say it was funny watching Chloe because when the hygienist took the toothbrush tool out of Chloe's mouth, Chloe would lick/eat the orange flavor toothpaste in her mouth.  She looked like an old woman without teeth cleaning her gums with her tongue, how she was moving her jaw.  I laughed out loud the two times she did it. 

I was really impressed how well both of them did.

Another odd but funny Chloe-ism tonight was after bath. Chloe was touching her head and saying something, I couldn't understand what.  We went back into the bathroom and she points at the hair dryer. She wanted her hair blown dry! Hilarious! So I complied. But I need to mention before the bath she had put her own shorts on after I changed her. She comes into the dinning room and I first notice the shorts on backwards. Then she turns around and I burst out laughing because she failed to pull the shorts up over her diaper. I told Joel that she definitely fits in the 'hood with how she's wearing those shorts. (We kind of live in the hood, but it's getting better, I think.) I should've gotten a picture but I didn't.

I'm trying to make this a quick entry, so one last thing is I got a new necklace in the mail on Friday. I ordered it from jc jewelry, an online personalized jewelry designer. I'm attaching a photo of it. I love it!

Saturday, August 10, 2013

We Be Jammin

What's been going on this past week you ask? Jam. That's what's going on. Blueberry lime jam made with the Michigan blueberries we picked last weekend.  As well as some peach jam because I bought a lot of peaches and needed to use them up. I did two batches of the blueberry lime as I'm not sure if the first batch set ok. But I just read it can take up to two weeks to set. Oh well. I was going to send a jar to my brother. Maybe give one to my brother in law as it's his birthday today. Happy Birthday Paul! The card will be in the mail as soon as I can remember where I put it- I just remembered. Now I will have to remember to put it in the mail.

I took the girls tobthe zoo today while Joel did a pub crawl. We had a good time.  I made sure to take pictures so I can scrapbook the day. I already have the zoo stickers.

Friday, July 19, 2013

Staples in the Head

The last picture was of Kylie's haircut. The flash was bright, that's why her eyes are half closed.  Here is a picture of the staples. Joel has to put on the triple antibiotic because I just can't.

Thursday, July 18, 2013

Scared

Tonight when I got home with the girls there was an accident. Joel had the day off so he was making dinner.  I had gotten out of work at 5:30 because I was trying to finish some stuff up. We got home and it's hot and I've a headache from this cold or sinus infection whatever it may be. Kylie is sleeping in the car but I'm not in the mood to carry her upstairs. I had Chloe inside and I get Kylie inside and go back to the van to get sippy cups and other items I don't want to leave in the van overnight. I come inside and say "I'm going upstairs." Both girls are just sitting on the steps waiting for me.  I had told them to get upstairs and they didn't budge. My hands are full and I'm trying to maneuver around them. Well, my shoulder hits a picture on the wall which falls and hits Kylie on the head. The corner hits her head and this picture is about 10 lbs. It's not light.

Kylie has this gash on her head and it's bleeding pretty bad. We get her upstairs and in the bathroom and Joel takes charge with getting the bleeding stopped or slowed, it didn't stop. Kylie is crying and Chloe is crying because Kylie is crying. What a mess! After 15 minutes Joel says we should go to the hospital. We all get in the van and go to the ER at DeVos. So thankful for their valet parking.
The nurse practitioner looks at the wound and says she'll need 3 staples in her head.  I have to hold a cotton ball to her head with the numbing medicine on it for 20 minutes and then they'll staple. At the 19 minute mark I was starting to freak out. I thought I saw a hole in her head.
The hospital does a wonderful job with kids. Kylie got to pet an Australian labradoodle named Deacon. Then when the staples were being done a woman had brought some books for Kylie to read to distract her. Of course it still hurt and when it was over the nurse practitioner said she wanted to put one more staple in. Oh boy! Kylie didn't like that but it got done. She did get a green slushy and a sticker book to color because she did a great job.   Then, because it was 8:00 and we didn't eat dinner yet we got McDonalds for the girls and Joel and I had what Joel had started making before the head injury occured.

I am scared like the subject line says because I think about tonight and I cry. I know stuff like this happens all the time but I don't want it to happen to my children. We already lost one of our girls.  I don't want to lose another.  I can't help but think that. I know it's not likely to happen, but it could. Kylie could get an infection and fever and... She already had this bad cough. I have this feeling we won't be going to see my brother in New York soon because something will happen.

I just had to get that out of my head. I feel a bit better. I've been thinking I may have to make an appointment with my counselor so she can reinforce everything is ok, kids have accidents and no one would make it to adulthood if all accidents ended badly. Wow! I did not think I'd react this way. But with the trauma from 2 years ago, it shouldn't surprise me. 

I know I need to turn to Jesus and give this all to Him and not worry. That is hard to do. I will try and pray.
I will try and post pictures. I just realized tonight I should see if blogger has an app and they do. I'm writing this on my phone. It's been 1 year and 1 month since we had internet. 

Kylie got her hair cut 2 days ago and it's adorable. Then I took some off the back of her head. Yucky! I couldn't wash her hair tonight and she kind of smells like blood. Ugh, not liking the smell. Her hair looks pink where there is blood. 

Good night, I pray it is a good night.

Sunday, May 12, 2013

Gaining Control

I read something in my devotional that hit home and I wanted to share it.  This is from Jesus Calling by Sarah Young, it's written as Jesus speaking:

"Do not search for security in the world you inhabit.  You tend to make mental checklists of things you need to do in order to gain control of your life.  If only you could check everything off your list, you could relax and be at peace. But the more you work to accomplish that goal, the more things crop up on your list.  The harder you try, the more frustrated you become.  There is a better way to find security in this life.  Instead of scrutinizing your checklist, focus your attention on My Presence with you.  This continual contact with Me will keep you in My Peace. Moreover, I will help you sort out what is important and what is not, what needs to be done now and what does not.  Fix you eyes not on what is seen (your circumstances), but on what is unseen (My Presence)."

From: Isaiah 26:3 and Corinthians 4:18

I'll try.  This is so, so hard to do. To gain control, let go. That seems so foreign to do.

Happy Mother's Day!

First of all, I'm sitting at Biggby coffee with Kylie.  She is watching My Little Pony on YouTube, the newer version that you can find on cable.  It keeps her busy and she loves the whipped cream with sprinkles she can get here.  I'm on another computer and I thought I'd use Google Chrome for once, so I get it set up to my page including my gmail.  I thought it would be pretty easy to also add my blog as a widget.  Think again.  I couldn't find it quickly when I  looked at the widgets so I said "forget it" and just went and searched for it in the search bar.  It took me 10 minutes to find my own blog! I'm guessing because I don't write much and people have stopped checking in because I don't write much.  I'm hoping soon we'll have the Internet working at the house again.  Hey, it's been about a year, it's time.

I actually did write a list of topics I can write about so that way I'm not sitting here going "uhhh, I don't have anything to say," or "I forgot what I was going to say."  Now I just don't know if I should space this out over a couple of blogs or write one big huge one.  I'll probably space it out because I'll run out of time.  Good thing there's like a hundred My Little Pony episodes : ) Kylie find something else to watch if she goes through all the MLP.

On May 1, I took Kylie to Kindergarten Roundup at St. Thomas.  We are excited to send her to this school, it's our Parish's school and they do such a wonderful job with the children.  At some point, I want to talk with the teachers and principle about Chloe and Faith and that Kylie will mention Faith sometimes.  She does at home so I'm thinking she might outside of home too. I want her to hear from other people that Faith is with Jesus in the most beautiful place you can't even imagine.

The Roundup we went to was in the afternoon which worked better for me.  I took a half day off, picked up Kylie and told her that if she would let me leave her in the Kindergarten room with all her new friends, we would go to Spoonlickers for ice cream (it's really frozen yogurt).  When we arrived at school, Kylie had a death grip on my arm and didn't want me to leave.  I stayed with her for 30 minutes.  We had gone to see the Enrichment teachers office. Kindergarten is only half day, 5 days a week.  Three days a week Kylie will be with the Enrichment teacher until school ends.  On those days she'll eat in the cafeteria with the older kids.  Fun! Fun!  After going back to the classroom, I reminded Kylie of our deal with ice cream.  She pushed me out the door.  I guess I shouldn't worry so much about her making friends.  I think I was awful at making friends when I was little and I don't want her to experience what I did.  A little insight to my childhood - 3rd grade my "best friend" told me on days when we had to play inside she would play with me, otherwise when we were outside, she didn't want anything to do with me.  That might not be how it really was, but that's what I remember.

The principle was serving coffee and cookies in the lounge so I went to visit her and some of the parents.  It was nice, except these parents will have their children in the afternoon class whereas Kylie is in the morning class. It was a good time, except the tooth pain I was experiencing.  Before long, Roundup was done and I picked her up.  I told her we would go to Spoonlickers and then to the long park (called so because it's a longer walk from our house, unlike the short park which is only 2.5 blocks away).

I love ice cream so I treated myself as well.  Spoonlickers is kind of expensive but it's understandable as they use organic all or most of the time.  Big mistake for me having ice cream. I was in excruciating pain.  I had called the dentist earlier in the day but they couldn't fit me in until the following Wednesday. I was going to Traverse City that weekend and I didn't want to have this pain, so I called the dentist back and they told me to come in right away if it hurt.  I took Kylie and she sat my lap watching SpongeBob while I had a root canal.  I was glad to have it done because my tooth didn't hurt anymore.

That's all I'll post in this post. I will do another one shortly (hopefully, I was having connectivity issues a minute ago).

Friday, April 19, 2013

It's my birthday today

Today is my birthday.  I have not done anything special yet as it's still morning, but doing nothing at all is a luxury.  Not for long though because then I start to think about what needs to be done.  At least I can thank the city for the "don't do laundry or run the dishwasher for a few days." The river is threatening to flood the waste water treatment plant, which if that happens, bad things occur like having to boil water before drinking.  I think we should have gone and visited my family this weekend : )  I'm not sure if I'd want to be gone though, what if water gets in our basement?  It hasn't, yet but what a mess!  It's been so rainy lately, and cold.  I like a quote I saw on Facebook, "Last year we prayed for rain, well God does answer prayers, just not on our timing but his."  Too true.

I feel I have lots to say, but can't think of anything right now!

I know later today, my family is getting our picture taken for the church pictorial book and then we'll go out for dinner.  Kylie is super excited, she wants to go to Houlihan's and get the corndog with strawberries like she had when I took her and my sister there a couple of weeks ago.  Plus she got ice cream with the meal.  I don't know how busy they are on a Friday night but I will call ahead and get a reservation so hopefully not too bad.

Maybe later I'll remember what I was going to post.

March 2013 pictures

 Butterflies are Blooming! Aren't they beautiful? 
 Kylie, Joel, and Chloe watching the Doodlebops.
Chloe, me, and Kylie watching Strawberry Shortcake!  Great show, although the girls were ready to go after an hour.  The show lasted an hour and a half.  Good thing we were in the balcony, the last full row of seats and no one was behind us.

Monday, March 4, 2013

Pictures - End of the Year to Kylie's Birthday



 At Grandpa and Grandma's house after Christmas 2012
 Chloe's birthday (day after party as she was a grump for her party so we put her to bed and she opened presents the next day).
 Kylie, during Chloe's dress up party
 Kylie's cake
Kylie opening her gifts at her party.

Faith's Day and Other Happenings

It's been 2 years since Faith went to Heaven.  Feels longer than that. I took the day off of work because I didn't know how I would do with today.  I'm doing pretty good.  I've kept myself really busy though. I moved 4 totes of clothes out of the basement to put with Chloe's things.  I kind of wish I had been more methodological when I packed away Kylie's clothes, but I wasn't so now I'm finding clothes that say 2T in the 3T tub because Kylie was able to wear them longer. That's why I decided just to bring everything out of the basement.  I did have some moments when I saw clothes that Kylie wore to the hospital to come visit me. To think of Kylie as being 3 doesn't seem that long ago.

I did do something today that I only thought about doing last night. I got my hair cut, 3 inches off. I didn't voice this to too many people but the last time I really had a haircut was March 7, 2011, the day before Faith's funeral.  I had a really hard time after that cutting it, I can't explain why.  I was half kidding, half not when I told some people that I wasn't cutting it until our house/kitchen was done. I've had my hair trimmed but never cut.  I felt like I could do it today as a sign that I am OK.  I am so very thankful to God for what I have and who my family is and so very thankful I believe in Him. This world would be a very dark place for me if I didn't have Him. I'm doing the devotional "Jesus Calling" and every day I read to ask Jesus to be with me.  I've heard this a lot in church too, make perfect sense so I try to remember to say it as often as I can.

As for other happenings, Chloe is doing good. So does have a cough but hopefully we can keep it until control.  We give her a nebulizer treatment everyday to help keep her airways open.  We are debating whether she should have the last RSV shots this month.  The doctor said to check who's sick a day care and if the season in Michigan has slowed down and then make a decision.  So that's what we will do. It's weird, these bills for the pharmacy don't seem to make it to us in a timely manner.  They always call me to say they need a payment before they can ship the shots. Last month someone finally made me aware of a assistance program we would be eligible for if Chloe didn't have secondary insurance, she doesn't right now.  If this was last year when she should have had the shots, she would have the medicaid and that's probably why no one mentioned this assistance before.  All I had to do was call a different department within this pharmacy (OptumRx) and answer some questions. We qualified for a $2000 debit card to use toward the bills.  Well, that got used up in one second as our balance was a little over $4,000. Good thing we have an HSA to pay the rest.   That was just the November to January bills.  I haven't seen Feb yet and that's why we need to decide about March shots.  I believe the price went up a bit because of Chloe's weight, that's what the nurse said, the dosage changed.

Birthdays birthdays birthdays. That's what else has been going on.  Chloe turned 2 on January 22 and Kylie turned 5 on February 21.  I think I talked about Chloe's party as a "Dress up" theme and food.  Kylie, I was thinking mermaid but I wanted substaintal food, not snacks.  I ended up with more of a rainbow theme. Rainbow Barbie cake, skittles, M&M's, and Kisses layered like rainbows in different glass vases. As for food, I didn't really have a theme.  Maybe "kid food" fish and chicken strips, french fries and carrot fries, and mac and cheese made with squash.  I wanted to be healthy as well, since there was candy on the table.  I am very fond of the cake I made, it came out great.  I took white cake mix, separated into 7 bowls and mixed in 7 different food colors, then dumped them all in the Barbie cake pan.  Then I used the mix in frosting and had 4 different flavors, mint chocolate, strawberry shortcake, cotton candy, and white chocolate raspberry.  Delicious! Oh - And I had rainbow Jell-O, Chloe loved it! I have to make more.  That seems to be the only way I really eat Jell-O anyway. I think it's fun to make.

I'm going to try to post pictures. After I publish this.

Sunday, January 27, 2013

Prayers Needed

I wish I was just writing about the birthday celebration we had for Chloe, but I'm not. What's on the forefront of my mind is Chloe being sick.  She's had a fever last week and on Saturday and then she has a cough, but now it seems she barely has a voice.  Poor girl, we're afraid this is turning into RSV - which just means a cold that she can't handle well by herself. Luckily we have some arbuterol from last year (I thought we didn't but we did).  It helps open the airways so we started giving that to her. I'm calling the doctor in the morning. Chloe just had her 2 year appointment on Friday and the doctor mentioned not liking the sound of her lungs, but Chloe wasn't cooperating well as she knows that room is the "bad" room where she gets her shots.  She just had the last sets of RSV shots on the 18th.  These don't prevent RSV, it's suppose to help fight it so she doesn't end up in the hospital. Grrr, sometimes I feel like a hamster on a wheel. Round and round, same thing as before.  I trust God and his plan, but I hope we are not being negligent somehow - not taking her to the ER or something along those lines.  At least, Joel pointed out, she is still acting like herself, wanting to play. We are watching what she eats because it does seem her appetite has decreased.  We are pumping her full of fluids, though. I even got some Pedialyte. She missed her party on Saturday.  She was so cranky at the start of it that we put her to bed and she didn't wake up at all (except when I woke her to change her diaper and put her into pj's). 

I wanted to talk to about how she is almost 30 pounds and is 33.5 inches long.  That her party was a "Dress Up" party.  I got the idea Thursday night.  She likes dressing up, so that was the focus.  We put out the dress up stuff and Kylie and her (they were the only kids except a 6 month old) dressed up.  Then we had "dress you salad" and "dress your dog" with some other food as well.  It went really well, except Chloe wasn't there.  She opened her gifts today. Kylie wants the Dora costume and swim doll that Chloe got.  Oh boy.  Great time to learn lessons in sharing and you can't always have what others have.

I also wanted to post pictures.  Someday.

The main focus is just making sure we are attentive to Chloe.

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

2013

2013 has arrived.  It feels like my accelerator is stuck at 80 mph and I can't slow down. I need to slow down as soon I will crash, but I don't know how.  Work is worse than home, I think. Or that's the way it feels because at home I can stay up late to get some things done whereas at work, I have to leave at 5 to get the girls. For some reason I feel like my workload is 5 times that of what it was last month. But it's to be expected now that year end is done and we have goals to meet in 2013. I just have to find a good way of managing it. My cubicle has exploded with paper recently. I don't notice so much because I work on a computer so I don't really notice until I'm leaving for the day or walking into the cube.   It's bad because we have a policy at work that we need to lock up confidential information, which is every paper.  I'm playing it safe.
As for home, I got down the Christmas decorations last Friday. That's not too bad, but my filing system at home has also exploded for some reason and we have tons of paper and other things that I need to take care of soon.  Plus the taxes. Plus filing out school registration for Kylie when that comes in the mail (should be soon). Plus keeping up on bills. Plus Chloe (and Faith's) 2nd birthday on Tuesday (plus getting a birthday card in the mail for my dad as the girls share his birthday, he was born waaaay before them : ) sorry dad, it's true).  Plus I'm scrapbooking this weekend - more for a get away and maybe birthday party planning than actually making progress on a scrapbook.
I may have fallen behind at home because I'm trying to do more with the girls as they are only this age once and we should be having fun.  The other night I told them to play dress up. Kylie was all over it. Chloe, a little hesitant to put on a princess dress, but she is all about the shoes. I did get a dress on her and she didn't seem to mind once it was on.  I see Kylie as the princess and Chloe as the hip mom when it comes to play time. I also found some games in a cupboard that Kylie could play (Scrabble Jr, Nemo, and Boggle Jr) so we play one or two a night after Chloe goes to bed. I love games. We even got Joel to play Nemo with us last night : ) He's not really a board game person.

We finally received a bill from the pharmacy for Chloe's RSV shot.  Strange thing is it's for the November shot. Not sure why it took so long.  The pharmacy called me today to get consent for the January shot and told me I had two bills outstanding. I told her I only got one, so she is sending the other one for December.  What are we paying out of pocket for 2012 you might wonder? Just for these shots: $1,287.  Good thing we have an HSA account. Each month total cost is $5,855.  Just over $29,000 for 5 months!  I have a high deductible of $2500 before insurance starts paying 80%, so I know what January's bill will be. WOW!
I was looking at the 2012 claims and a month of these shots is almost equivalent to a day in the hospital. The dosage is based on her weight and she weighs about 29 pounds so that's why it cost more because it comes in 2 vials. So when we go to the doctor's office, they get 2 nurses to each shoot up a leg.  She is going to be so scared of that place in a few months, poor baby. She doesn't cry for long, but still those crocodile tears make me sad. I know it's for her own good with her in daycare, kids are always sick there.

Hopefully I'll post some birthday pictures next week. Stay tuned...